Saturday, September 29, 2007


I am in pain. I can barely walk. My leg/back/hip seems to be all screwed up. It is my back. I am going to wander to the pharmacy to get a refill of my muscle relaxers. I am blue. I wondered if I was just sad or depressed...but as I thought about dreary ideas, I figured it was a medically depressed sort of thing. I just thought it would be awful to everyone if I ended up in the hospital again. I have two papers due...really soon. One on Monday and one Wednesday. I was invited to a "candle party" of those tupperware like home shopping parties. I want to go because it is a girl I know from my high school days who lives a couple blocks down. But me being blue and sad and miserable...I thought was not a great time to hang among strangers and far acquaintances. I have a ticket to so see Micheal Moore Lecture today at my school. I'll manage that.

But depression ....again?

I slept 10 hrs the last couple of days
Feel crappy
Eat sugar until green

This is getting old. I guess I will always be like this. I am lonely. And sad, and stressed, or not stressed enough.
I really should be writing these papers.

I am just so tired.

Maybe getting a drug...that will aide in my ability to walk.....will be a first step.


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