Why do I do this to myself?

I have a paper, no two, a case study a lab...blah blah blah
Tons of crap-o-la of school work.
And again, I accomplished little

I was going to go to the coffeehouse
Eat a nice salad, laptop, work
It was mobbed with holiday shoppers

So I go home
Sit in front of the computer
And draw a blank

And sit here
playing this stupid game
Suffering
Not allowing myself any fun
Unless I do some work

I am my own worse enemy

And then I get into this self-loathing thing
I cannot wait until school is over

(BLAH!)