Have you ever felt....

Like maybe you do things that you don't remember, or live a double life that even is hidden from yourself. Dissociation Disorders. While crazier than a loon (not really) in a mental ward, I was giving a crazy diagnosis. One in which given to me by a fool. The doctor who thought that praying to Jesus would have saved all on the unit. With blatant disregard for others rights, when one has so little power. The abuse of power. He was too blinded by his own religious zeal, he had no idea that he hurt so many. He meant well, he really did think he was doing God's work. Except, he wasn't.

So the feelings of crazy.

My dreams are vivid. I dream a lifetime in an evening. The meds. The crazy meds.

I sometimes forget words, and have trouble concentrating at times. Sometimes, I get so distracted I stop talking in mid sentence. I am sometimes in such a blur (concentrating on a task), I wonder if I had conversations in which I was not present to. Anxiety perhaps.

But the fear of having multiple personalities? Is that a new illness? I don't think I am...but when people look at me weird, or if I stumble over words, or if I have weird thoughts....I think I may be more crazy than I know I am.

At my new temp job...I think people may think I am crazy. Am I? or just delusionally anxious?

I don't know.